My plan for life was to have a career, happily married with 3 children, house, dog and 3 cars. My American Dream! By the way, this was all to be done by the age of 30 years old. But that was not my reality. By the age of 30, I was divorce, alone, no kids, and no dog. However, I did have a career and a house. My point is that life does not turn out exactly how we plan it.

Everyone has heard the quote – 

“When Life gives you lemons, make lemonade”

  But I would like to take it one step further and add:

“When Life gives you lemons, make lemonade…AND Give it away for others to enjoy!

You may be wondering why I would add this. Well, let me explain this to you. In life, you will be given lemons. And some have lemons THROWN at them pretty hard. It can hurt when it is thrown hard. It could be things like a divorce, death, poverty, etc.

Now, we have a choice of what we do with these lemons. Many people will eat the lemons. Tasting a lemon is very bitter and sour. So, if we eat the lemons in life, it becomes bitter and sour to our soul. You may have heard of a “Pity Party.” Yes, that is what happens to us if we eat the lemons of life. We feel sorry for ourselves.

What we need to do with these lemons is to allow God to make lemonade out of life! He is the lemonade maker! Making lemonade is a process. The juice has to be squeezed out. God has to squeeze you so then he can add sugar (his sweetness) and water (Jesus the living water) to the mix. If these two ingredients are not added, you will just be bitter and sour for the rest of your life. Once the lemonade is made, don’t just have it for yourself. You must share it with others so they can be refreshed as well!

Do you know why I am able to help a lot of women that are hurting and broken? Not because I am a good talker, but because I share my life experiences with them. I am transparent, real and don’t put on a façade. When I share how I overcame life’s challenges, it gives other people hope that they TOO can make it. This also brings healing to my own life. It’s a win-win for everyone!

“Anyone who intends to come with Me has to let Me lead. You’re not in the driver’s seat; I am” – Matthew 16:24 (MSG)

When we truly give up our lives and follow Jesus, then that means our lives are not ours anymore. It’s to be shared with everyone else in making a difference in this world. That is why I wrote the book the “Born-Again Virgin”. It’s about my life journey as a Christian Single adult and the process God brought me through to be that Born-Again Virgin for my husband.

Mike was a Pastor when I met him. When he started pursuing me, I thought I was never holy or spiritual enough to be a Pastor’s wife. I ran from him. I ask God, “Doesn’t Mike know what kind of background I came from? Why would Mike want someone like me who had slept around with so many men?”

God brought me to the story in the bible of Hosea and Gomer. Hosea was a righteous man and he married Gomer, who was the total opposite. She was not only promiscuous, but a prostitute. That did not matter to Hosea. He loved her no matter what. This is the same type of love that Christ has for us. I knew Jesus loves me no matter what because that is the way HE is. So I didn’t have a problem with Agape love from God. But I couldn’t fathom that from a man. That is where God had to work in my heart to let me know and show me that Mike loved me no matter what my past was like. WOW! And the rest is history.

When you let God lead you and you surrender to His will, then life is refreshing like lemonade.

“When Life gives you lemons, make lemonade…AND Give it away for others to enjoy!”

 If you want to share your story with us, please email it to info@bavirgin.com

The butterfly was not always a winged creature. It goes through its own life cycle that consists of 4 stages. The first stage is the form of an egg. The next stage is the larvae or caterpillar. It spends all it’s time in search of food and eats, eats, and eats some more. Caterpillars mature through a series of stages called instars. During this stage of its life, it molts or in other words, loses its old skin many time as it grows.

The 3^rd stage is called the Pupa, or what I like to call the resting stage in a cocoon. When the caterpillar is fully grown, it makes a button of silk which it uses to fasten its body to a leaf or a twig. Then the caterpillar’s skin comes off for the final time. It wraps itself in silk and forms a cocoon around it.

The 4^th and final stage of this creature is the adult stage or as we all know as the Butterfly.  After it emerges from its pupal stage, a butterfly cannot fly until the wings are unfolded. A newly-emerged butterfly needs to spend some time inflating its wings with blood and letting them dry, during which time it is extremely vulnerable to predators. Some butterflies’ wings may take up to three hours to dry while others take about one hour. Then this beautiful butterfly creature is ready to fly and explore the world from a different perspective.

Let’s really focus on the 3^rd stage when the caterpillar is in a cocoon. Stick with me and you will learn something important to your life. The cocoon is made for the protection of the caterpillar. When looking at a cocoon, it is very ugly on the outside.  It has been said that the most beautiful butterflies have actually emerged from the ugliest cocoons. The cocoon provides a hard protective coating that is oftentimes camouflaged so that predators cannot see them. They stay there an entire season (usually during wintertime). Inside, the old body parts of the caterpillar are undergoing a remarkable transformation, called ‘metamorphosis’.

The dictionary definition of Metamorphosis is a change of physical form, structure, or substance especially by supernatural means and a striking alteration in appearance, character, or circumstances. Anything that undergoes a metamorphosis is usually accompanied by a change of habitat or behavior. Science cannot explain what happens within metamorphosis except to say that it is a supernatural process that takes place.

When it’s time for the butterfly to emerge and come out of the cocoon, it must struggle and fight its way out. During this process it will become completely exhausted and stop struggling for long periods of time. Then it would begin to fight again until it finally is free of the cocoon that has trapped it inside during this season of its life.

Now if you ever have seen this process, you may be tempted to help this process by tearing open the cocoon – but that’s the worst thing you could do.  You may think you are helping that beautiful butterfly, but you would really be killing it.  Instead of setting the butterfly free, the reality is that it will never flew away and, eventually will die. The struggle that it has to go through makes it strong and enables it to fly. Interesting that God even made Butterflies to have adversity to become what God intended them to be.

A caterpillar went into the cocoon, but something entirely different came out. What was once an unattractive creepy crawly thing is something beautiful beyond understanding. The butterfly and caterpillar is the same living creature, yet different. It has gone through a metamorphosis or what we call transformation for human life.

Some of you right now may feel that you are trapped inside a cocoon.  But don’t stress.  That’s the perfect place you need to be during this season of your life.  Understand that this is God’s protective environment for you to go through the process to become something beautiful and reach the heights God wants to take you! Look at this time of being transformed, not trapped!

(Psalm 18:30 NLT) As for God, his way is perfect. All the LORD’s promises prove true. He is a shield for all who look to him for protection.

Here are some things you need to do while you are in your cocoon being transformed:

1. Enjoy the season. Enjoy the protection. Enjoy the rest.
2. DO NOT RUSH things. This process must take time to truly change you.
3. Stay put. When others try to take you away before it’s time thinking they are helping you, understand that they are really hurting you more than helping. Don’t let them take you out!
4. The fight and struggle you go through is to build your character and for you to fully develop into that man or woman God has called you to be. Because when that time comes for you to break out of your cocoon, God will take you to higher levels that you can’t even imagine.

A caterpillar is physically limited to the ground. However, a butterfly sees a whole new world from a different perspective and has the freedom to go places it only dreamed of as a caterpillar.

2 Corinthians 5:17 – Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation; the old has gone, the new has come!

Once you become that butterfly, God is going to take you to new heights and will enlarge your territory.

1 Chronicles 4:10   -  Jabez cried out to the God of Israel, “Oh, that you would bless me and enlarge my territory!

Remember that if you are feeling trapped in a cocoon – Endure and persevere one day at a time, before you know it, you will become that beautiful creature like the butterfly that God has always intended you to be!